Strange Behaviour

I have started doing something very strange recently. I go online shopping, filling my cart with hundred of pounds worth of beautiful goodies only to press the 'empty cart' button and walk away feeling 'almost' totally fulfilled.

I select Paumes Books, go designer shopping at net a porter, dream about beautiful stuff here, here and here and then forget the lot.

It's great I get the kick of shopping and the thrill of knowing that I could have had it but I chose to save my money for fun times with the kids and for something much more practical. It's the shopping version of porn I suppose and I'm addicted.

ONE

Daniel was One Year Old last week. He is growing so fast that it scares me, it's also pretty exciting though.

Not only is he totally gorgeous he is developing the most amazing personality. Like his big sister he has a great sense of fun and is quick to laugh and make all around him laugh too.

He is bold and brilliant, fun and cuddly, he smells yummy, makes ladies swoon and makes men laugh at his daring, he can say lots of words and loves his family.

WE LOVE YOU DANNY BOY - our family is complete and you are the icing on the cake. Happy Birthday.

P.s. The reason that this post is late is because Lilly has come down with chicken pox, we knew it was coming and hoped she would get a mild case - it isn't - she has it bad but as usual she is coping well even though the itch drives her to the point of insanity sometimes. She has hundreds and hundreds of spots on the inside as well as the outside - it is awful but if you are going to do something you should do it in grand style and she certainly is.

Yummy

I just had a food delivery from the lovely people at Ocado. Whilst putting away all of the yummy stuff I noticed just how beautiful some of the stuff in my cupboards is.

Take a look at these three items - perfect examples of delicious food but not only that, they are also presented in the most beautiful packaging making them a joy to handle, use, eat and enjoy. Why can't eveything be so gorgeous?

What packaging makes you happy? Take a look around today - I'm also loving the Method cleaner I use in the bathroom, the can of my Elnett hairspray and the cardboard of a Dorset Cereal packet - all these small things can really lift my day and make the mundane a little more bearable.

Is it just me?

Putting it all into perspective

I always have loads on my mind, infact it's a wonder I ever sleep as my brain is in constant motion thinking and worrying about things. Currently I am worrying about the following (this is just a small sample!!!!).....

a larger than average mastercard bill

the fact that I haven't sown my tomato seeds yet

a misunderstanding with a friend

that I still haven't finalised outfits for a wedding in two weeks time

packing for the trip to the wedding

library books need returning

the possibility of chicken pox

a children's party to plan

the list is actually endless and then I read one of my favourite blogs and realised just how ridiculous all this is. I found this blog when Lilly was a baby, her oldest girl is the same age and I found comfort in the fact that she was expereincing similar things to me. Since then she has moved to Uganda with her husband who is an aid worker and reading this post this morning made me think just how crazy I am to worry about the stuff I do. If you want to take a look clicky here!!!!

I love it

My taste, in most things, isn't mainstream. I don't run with the crowd. Even though I look 'average', I feel distinctly 'different'. I love a good freak and Boy George is my favourite 'freak' of all. I can't tell you how much I would have loved to have been at this gig - it is just my thing and even though the sound is terrible on this clip - I can tell the atmosphere in the place was just as you would expect at an intimate gig with George - cool, relaxed, fun and ultimately fab. Heaven - to me!

Go On Take A Peek

I posted back in February that decorating and spring cleaning were on the cards. Well, we have made a start and I thought I would share a few pics of my favourite bits of my house with you.

This is our newly red and white lounge. It feels lovely, spacious and clean.



This is our new family motto! To be chanted daily!!!!



This is a peek into our bedroom - how colourful, how Cath Kidston, how much do I love it - LOADS!



This is our new family room - I love it in here. We often sit in here to chat, read and to chill out with Dennis (our fish)



Finally (for now) here is a couple of shots of our newly spring cleaned kitchen..



This corner is especially important - radio and coffee machine - two essentials for every day!!!



That's it for now. Still some rooms to do - children's rooms both need some attention and then the conservatory and then the big one - the garden, which needs lots and lots of TLC. Keep popping by for more pics as we work our way through the house. x

Bags of Fun

Tonight I put my Christmas pressie (sewing machine) and birthday pressies (sewing book and gorgeous Cath Kidston fabrics) to good use and made myself a tote bag.

I made a few errors along the way but generally I am very chuffed indeed. I will be using it on my next shopping trip - let's hope it can hold up to the job.

Happy Easter

I won't be around for a few days. Too busy stuffing myself silly with chocolate eggs - back next week after a rest with renewed vigour and a larger waist.

Beautiful Book

This gorgeous book is a part of my Birthday gifts. It is a visually stunning book, it is about one of my favourite subjects (home and family) and is just lovely in every way. It even smells good, do you know what I mean? It isn't a glossy book - the pages have that wonderful 'booky' smell an d I just can't wait to sit down with a glass of wine and devour its pages.

Part of the introduction describes the book like this......

"Our home life can have a huge impact on who we are; as adults it affects our daily lives and moods, and for children it influences the kind of people they will become."

If that speaks to you - go buy this book - it's dreamy.

The Luckiest Woman Alive

Well, today is my birthday. It's not something that I was looking forward to particularly as I am approaching THE BIG ONE at high speed now and it is just not funny.

Although, I did have the loveliest day ever today. Firstly I spent two hours in bed with my gorgeous family. I was smothered with kisses, jumped on, cuddled, dribbled on and given fabulous gifts. The perfect morning.

I then received more phone calls and text messages than I though possible and the lovely man from Ocado arrived with my croissants.

After a very lovely morning of hanging out in my pjs and getting a visit from my sis in law, we went out for lunch.

The kids were fab as usual (although Danny boy is getting rather vocal for posh venues - luckily we were having pizza!)

After a spot of shopping we came home to chill. A constant procession of friends and family arrived all afternoon, which was lovely. I received so many gorgeous gifts and am just overwhelmed by how fab my mates are. Several of them had made a super special effort to seek out my most favourite things and I feel so lucky to have these wonderful women as my friends.

The children are now in bed and I am about to look at some beautiful books that I received today, I have drunk far too wine today and eaten more food than is decent but hey it's my birthday and old birds like me deserve a treat.

To all my lovely friends and family - thank you - I love you all and feel truly blessed to have you in my life! Cheers!!!!

Pretty

It is my birthday very soon and although I don't get very excited these days (stopped counting them 8 years ago!), I have taken the opportunity to buy a few special things for myself recently.

A huge pile of beautiful books should be arriving at the door next week, a very lovely parcel from a local contemporay home accessory shop should also be with me early next week but today Mr Postie brought me these lovelies. Apparently they are 1950's Dutch coffee cups but all I know is that they are very lovely, make me feel all spring like and make me want to find uses for them.

I love beautiful things and am very lucky to be surrounded by gorgeousness every day. What more could I ask for?

Spring Cleaning Fever

It's official. Spring Cleaning is beginning. My housekeeping box is stocked and ready to follow me everywhere as I get into all those nooks and crannies. It's lovely. I love how a room feels after a good spring clean, It almost sparkles and gleams at you.

My Spring Cleaning follows quite a long drawn out process and will take me several weeks to complete but as they say if a job's worth doing it's worth doing well.

I have started with de-cluttering. Approx 6 bin bags of stuff have already left the house to various charity shops and recycling centres and there is still more to clear. This is such an important step - you can't clean properly if there is clutter.

Then each room needs to cleaned in a methodical manner starting at the ceiling and ending with floorboards.

All cupboards will be emptied and restocked, discarding along the way.

I will be starting the BIG CLEAN next week and will put my step by step process on here as I go. C'mon clean along with me!!! I don't want to be alone and we can be all smug together in a months time when our houses gleam and wink at us.

But first...... more decluttering. I still have several rooms to do - children's rooms and half of the conservatory and then I'll be ready to start. Crack out the rubber gloves we're going in...............

EDIT - I am working on a new blogging project which will appear soon, therefore the spring cleaning plan won't appear here as there will be a new home for that kind of thing. IF you still want to clean along with me - message me and I can email my daily plan direct to you.

Friends

Just two quotes for now.........

Friends are like stars - You don't always see them but you know they are there

Friends are like bras - close to your heart and always there for support.

Take your pick.

That is all.

I'm having a think

I am reading a lovely book called Tuesday with Morrie. It is the kind of book that makes you want to change things in your life and see what is important a little more clearly.

This quote from the book kind of sums stuff up ....

"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half asleep, even when they are busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning."

This is so true and also so sad that there are so many lonely people living in our community, people who think they are living a great life but in actual fact are pretty empty. Money seems to be king for so many people and I wonder where they would be if the house, the car and the salary disappeared overnight.

If they don't have anything else, anything bigger, anything deeper to give them faith, love and hope then really they have nothing.

Recently, I have been bleating on about how tired I am and how hard I have been finding having two children. I have now gotten over myself and have reassessed lots of things in my life.

I really am taking stock - the book I mentioned above is basically the words of wisdom of an old man who is about to die (I know it doesn't sound like a right riveting read - but believe me it's great). His advice to a young man is to take a long look at yourself and your life and if today was your last day on earth - how would you feel about that?

Would you check your emails instead of playing with your baby? Would you take that phone call from work rather than finger paint with your toddler? Would you spend time wallowing in celebrity news rather than asking your neighbour how they are today? are you doing what is right?and do you now realise what the most important thing in life is - LOVE.

Eggcellent

As I have been saying, things have taken a real turn around these parts recently. Not only am I rediscovering the joys of homecooking and am taking my housework to a new level of bliss but I have recently started being a bit crafty too.

Not only have I been making decorations, teaching myself some crochet, and taking part in some international gift swapping (I am currently buying gifts for a buddhist, vegan man in Brazil - no joke!!!!) I have also been trying to learn how to sew. I am not at all talented at this kind of thing but I am so interested in teaching myself new skills. Yesterday I completed my very first items. The pictured egg cosies above. Now, I know they are a little big and a little wonky but they do look so cute when all lined up together and our Easter breakfast table will look lovely with them keeping our eggs warm. I showed them to Lilly this morning and she kissed me and said "thank you for making those Mummy". I feel very proud of myself and things can only improve with practice.

I'll be opening my own cottage business before you know it - anyone want a dress running up?

It's all about ME!!!!!

By it's very nature blogging is very self centred - but today I really have been thinking about ME.

Two things happened today that made me think about myself.

Firstly I bumped into an old friend, I worked with her more than 10 years ago (we also did a far bit of partying). It was a real surprise to see her locally as the last time I saw her was in Slough. I worked with her for a relatively short amount of time (about 2 years) but during that time we knew so much about each other - we shared our lives, we worked hard together and we played hard together and we shared stuff. You know, we talked about our families, our feelings, our relationships.

Later I was talking to another friend who I have known for about 4 years and talking to her I realised that we share very little. Yes we are friends, yes we talk, but during our conversation I became aware that she knew nothing about me really. Nothing about my deepest feelings, nothing about my past. She made a comment about her being defined by her career and that she wasn't really a homebody like me. At this point I realised that I have never spoken AT ALL about my previous professional life to any of my recently made friends.

Why is this? Why is it that I used to share so much of myself with my friends (and still do with those same people) but my recently made friends know nothing much about what makes me tick?

What is it that holds me back? Or is it that my newer relationships are based on something different and I don't feel the need to open my heart.

If you think you are one of the people mentioned above - and you are now worried that we have shared too much or too little - don't worry that's not what this post is about. I have no desire to start bleating on about past achievements. What intrigues me is why I am so different now. Why is it that all that people now know of me is my children. Is that who I am now? Have I stopped sharing of myself because all I am is my children - I don't think so, I am sure I am still the same person I was - with just as much to give to a friendship.

I need to look deep inside myself and maybe I need to tweak a few things.

Blimey, It really is all about meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

I'm a Mum!!!

I said I'm a Mum - I'm a Mum of two.

How can it be?

This is me.

I am the girl who once said that her dream job was a 'pole dancer' and that's nothing to do with getting my groove on in Poland. I'm the girl who would be at every party and always be the last to leave - that was me!

I am the girl who lived in an area that saw me at the wrong end of a gun and had almost daily threats of violence aimed at me.

I am the girl who grew up a little and decided she wanted to start a family and whose baby didn't come along as planned.

I am the girl who went through ten years of heartache and thinking I would never be called Mummy.

I am now a different person, I live in a beautiful area in a beautiful home with my lovely hubby and my TWO children. I am a housewife and am living the life that I always wanted.

I am so lucky and today I am so very grateful to HIM for my family and the happiness they have brought into my life.

Oh, and by the way - there is still a bit of me that would LOVE to pole dance.

Happy Days

Danny Boy is still ill, poor little thing looks terrible but is actually quite bright on himself and had another great nights sleep despite coughing his way though it.

The kids and I took a walk in the sunshine today (to the chemist to pick up drops for his gunked up eyes) and it was lovely. Nature is bursting into life everywhere. On our walk we collect some sticks which we cam home and painted white. We then got busy finding sping/easter items to dangle from the twigs. We are going to add lots more things during the coming weeks.

It was a lovely thing to do and the result is lovely and keeps making me smile everytime I walk into the room. Lilly loves the chicks around the base best and is calling them her friends (!)

So although things are yucky with a sick boy and miles of snot streaming from his nose and gallons of gunk pouring from his bloodshot eyes, I have actually maintained a sunny dispostion. How could you not on such a beautiful day? From where I am sat right now I can see my little girl playing Barbie, a vase full of tulips, washing blowing on the line, a tree full of pink blossom and our Easter 'tree' - fab! Days like this are good.

Spring, Bounce and Loadsa Snot

My poor baby is in a bad way. He has a stinking cold, is full of snot which is making him be sick, is teething like a demon and has conjunctivitis. He has also taken a couple of tumbles and has two bumps on his head. Poor little monkey. He is very emotional and clingy but also the freaky thing is he slept ALL NIGHT LONG for the first time ever. Not so sure tonight will be so pleasant though.

Whilst he took a nice two hour nap yesterday afternoon, I decided to start my spring cleaning with gusto. Wow - I only worked for about an hour but managed to fill enough bin bags to fill the boot of the car. My parents have just taken it all away to the recycling centre - so the house is taking a sigh of relief as it breathes a little easier.

I am about to attack another room right now and have an action plan ready for March. This is all part of my new 'clean start'. If you know me you know how much I love my home but I really feel it needs a little love and attention to bring it back to it's full glory and that is what I am about to do.

I will post some pictures of each room during March as they are completed to show just how shiny everything is.

Gotta dash - there's a cupboard that needs straightening!!!!!

I LOVE lists

How I love this cute little card organiser application. It is just the geeky kind of thing that makes my day - see it doesn't take much to please me.

Look at the things on it though - how homespun, how housewifely, how lovely.

I have been through a bit of an emotional time of late, battling and trying to share myself between a boy who wants to find trouble, a girl who craves her mummy's attention and a desire to be the 'perfect' housewife. I think have sorted all these issues now and am tackling things from a new angle - lets hope it works.

You see I love being a Homemaker. It brings me joy.

I don't spend my time dreaming up new ways to 'make house' because I think I should, I do it because it's something that I love and want to do well, for me and for my family.

I don't want to offend anyone when I say this but I don't care if people think what I do is right or wrong, worthwhile or purely old fashioned, it really doesn't matter to me because I know that what I do actually enables me to work toward being who I want to be and how I want my family to be.

Lists are a big part of this life and just seeing all those gorgeous homey things to do makes me realise how happy and lucky I am to be doing exactly what I should be doing and although at present things aren't picture book perfect - I am enjoying working towards it.